Schlaff Gut!

Fridays have always been a good day, and starting this new school year they just got better! Taz is now in kindergarten and he has one of the most erratic schedules. I’ll spare you the details, but Tuesday is now the only morning I have with him. Time with only Little Bean is so easy. She is really good at playing by herself and most of the time just wants me to sit and watch her do her thang. She brings me treats and concoctions she’s fixed up in her kitchen. I mime eating these delicacies and then she’s off to the lab to do more work. She also likes to sit and “read,” which involves her rolling her tongue around in her mouth and making the odd sound.

Today we played a game she often requests: Schlaff. Schlaffen means to sleep in Deutsch. She says to me, “Dina. Schlaff!!” Little Bean proceeds to push me down to the floor on top of the giant yoga mat in the living room. She then begins to cover me with objects she believes I need for slumber. First comes the Barbie Prince, obviously I wouldn’t want to be lonely. Then she brings me two nooshies, small comfort blankets that look like cheesecloth.On top of my side she continues to pile: a folded up blanket, five Euros in coins, two walkie-talkies, a Polly Pocket mirror and comb, a scarf, and a book about Christmas. She waves her hand and wishes me Gut Nacht. As she’s toddling away she suddenly remembers something she’s forgotten. “Oh nay!” she exclaims and throws her hands over her mouth. She runs to the play room and grabs the keystone to my nap. “A gookie!!” This is actually a nookie, which is a pacifier. She brings me two and won’t rest until I put one in my mouth. This is in no way going to happen (if you’ve seen these floors you would know why) and I pretend to put it in my mouth as I turn my head. I then spend the next twenty minutes laying on the ground, “napping.” I would have gotten up sooner but every time I made to move she started screaming and throwing my head back down. I happened to be wearing my nice, i.e., expensive glasses and really didn’t want them warped.

Taz, Rapunzel, Rapunzel’s playdate friend, and the Mom walk in to find me prone on the floor. The Mom is used to this game so for her it was no big deal. Rapunzel’s friend, however, gave me this look that said, “Who is this fool lying on the ground, covered in junk? She’s expected to take care of you children?” Believe it or not, sister, I get paid to do this.

Stumbled across this blog today. I wouldn’t consider myself an active member of the Grammar Police, but I admit I can be a bit of a stickler on some things. The Oatmeal has some great posts about how to use important things like apostrophes, “i.e.,” and “e.g.” as well as funny stories and comics. It’s along the same lines as Hyperbole and a Half. If you’re sitting around, twiddling your thumbs and looking for something to do, send yourself to the site. Certainly worth a gander.

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One thought on “Schlaff Gut!

  1. XXXTINA! can’t believe i’m just finding this gem. hope you are still having a great time in switz! miss you and am looking forward to hearing about your adventures…your stories are always the best. and if more involve faking little kids out with nookies, i know i won’t be dissapointed 😉

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