What’s In a Name?

I just finished Chelsea Handler’s Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang and it was terrific. Although she can be very crass and inappropriate, two adjectives I don’t usually find myself drawn to, her writing is out-of-bounds hilarious. It took me just over 24 hours to read it, but a size-able amount of that time was spent on public transportation. I often found myself laughing out loud and earning the occasional glance by a Swiss person, shocked to see a public display of emotion that does not involve swallowing someone’s face (seriously, the PDA here is Ridiculous). I just couldn’t control myself. The shenanigans she finds herself in constantly leave me scratching my head, yet simultaneously wanting more. Her one-lines can’t be beat, either. Whilst sitting by the lake this afternoon, Jill and I were going back and forth quoting the book nonstop. If you don’t mind some vulgarity and an extremely blunt voice, then I would recommend this read (Mom, this is NOT for you).

One thing Handler talks about in this book is nicknames. She calls everyone she cares for “Chunk,” no matter gender, age, race, or in her case, species, as this is also the name of her dog. It got me thinking about nicknames in my own life, some that I have been called and others that I use to refer to others. I have compiled a list of some of the monikers I can be found responding to:

  • Tina
  • Teeny
  • Teen
  • Teen Been
  • Triple X (as in X-Tina)
  • Trip
  • T Nasty (if I were ever on “Jersey Shore”)
  • T Bone (Bark!)
  • Sleazy T
  • Katinka
  • Bobus
  • Krusty
  • Trina

The list is pretty extensive, with most all the names not coming into use until college. It’s not that I was opposed to them, they just were never a part of my life. Some people like to assume I go by “Kristy” or “Kris” but if you know me at all you know that those will NEVER happen. Most recently I have been named “Iced Tea” by the other au pairs, specifically you, Jill. This has also been shortened to “Iced.” Little Bean has referred to me as “Mama” ever since I’ve been here, but she too has joined the dark side and given me a name. Now, whenever I hear, “DIA!!!!” I know to whom she is speaking. I love nicknames; I think they’re great. I happen to love coming up with my own as well, a few of which I will share with you here:

  • Courtney– C Slice Money Bags
  • Matt– Brother Starship Commander
  • Mom– Marmy or Marmadoodle
  • Dad– Popsicle
  • Madeline –Madge, Madiero, Mad-dog
  • Kathryn– Baby Girl
  • James– Jams
  • Matt Settle– Settle Face
  • Libby– Libsicle
  • Beth– Bethany (although her real name is Elizabeth)
  • Kara– Karab
  • Kasey– Kase Factor 3000 (or was it 2?)
  • Claire– Clairina

I know there are many others, but they just aren’t coming to me at this time. Like I said in a previous entry, these names usually have no rhyme or reason and they are completely random. But once they are stuck in my head I have hard time shaking them.

On a completely different note, I would like to wish a very Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there, especially mine. I love you, Mom! You are the greatest mom and friend and I am so glad to have you in my life. You are an incredibly caring, compassionate, and thoughtful person. Our whole family is blessed to have you. I hope today is wonderful for you! I wish I could be there to celebrate, but know I am sending you lots of love and my ever-increasing appreciation (and if it comes by Swiss mail, then you know it’s reliable and timely). I am posting the following song in honor of you because I know how much you love it. Just imagine me doing my little dance move with it. I bet you won’t be able to resist trying it out yourself. Just remember it’s: Arm Up, Down, Middle, Down, Up, Down, Middle, Down…

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One thought on “What’s In a Name?

  1. They must have mistaken Jared Schnefke for John Travolta because that is EXACTLY what Jared looks like when he dances. Encircled by a crowd and everything.

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